Following the Big Bang around 13.8 billion years ago, our
newborn baby:
A skipping string of designs, stars, galaxies, and galactic
clouds in a backyard.
She recycles remnants into baskets of black holes.
I recall writing,
“At times I wonder perhaps we are the living relatives of
cosmic rays
at an imaginative focal length: when the lens is focused
at infinity.”
late midnight
the bookmark I place
in quantum physics
Pan Haiku Review Issue 4, 2024 (Ed. Alan Summers)
paperback, 60 pages, ISBN: 978-1-8380312-8-2, £ £6.50 (incl. p&p)
from johngonzalez@hotmail.co.uk
As I sat reading I
am a Woman my wife glanced over and read one of the
tanka. She asked if she could take a closer look and it was some while
before she gave the book back. This is testament to the power of this
fascinating work.
The book is a celebration of womanhood and follows the life of a
particular woman. I was specifically struck by the joyousness of her early
years.
hide and seek
like the moon and clouds
papa plays with her
fondly pretends to hide
till he confirms she scores a win
And her parent’s
sacrifices ...
they toil hard
for earning an extra
to brighten her life
they wish
to witness smiles on her face
Then comes the moment when she boards the school bus with her parents
eagerly watching ‘till the bird goes out of their sight.’ And similarly, years
later
she remembers
the thick tears of her parents
she steps out with blessings
with her umbilical cord still intact
for an extended home with someone else
Despite her hopes and times when ‘everything looks to glitter’ ... ‘slowly
there is a change’ and sadness and loneliness looms. Here the tanka takes
on a reflective quality.
she recalls
jumping with joy
hand in hand
with her mummy
clasping to catch the sky
I am a Woman is beautifully imagined. It is a story of a life, its
complexities, joys, hopes, sorrows and resilience. As I read, I was
thoroughly absorbed (and my wife was too!)
Pravat Kumar Padhy, who resides in Bhubaneswar, India, has many
publications and awards to his credit and is also Haibun Editor of the
online journal ‘Under the Basho’. Published by The Magic Pen Press, I
am a Woman is a splendid, well-produced publication with verse that
resonates and tells what is a richly layered story.
‘... life is a poem and music a journey’
I am a Woman – what a journey it tells.
Highly recommended.
-Neil Somerville
Tanka Poetry and Social Commentary: A Powerful
Combination
Hema reviews Dr Pravat
Kumar Padhy’s tanka poem, I am a Woman, exclusively for Different Truths,
highlighting its poignant exploration of women’s struggles and resilience.
‘Dedicated
to all women who symbolise beauty, love, kindness, compassion, well-being,
harmony and creation….’ The above lines in the collection “I am a Woman” struck
a chord instantly and enticed me to dive deeper. Pushing aside
stereotypical representations of women as passive, emotional, and complex, the
five-line poems in this collection are fictional sketches (verisimilitude, in
my opinion) of a woman’s agonies, psycho-social issues, and resilience that
have been articulated with precision and persuasion.
The
five-line verses are significant and have a stimulating influence in
contemporary society where atrocities against women are on the increase,
notwithstanding that writers are questioning traditional gender roles like
never before. (largely women) who are attempting to recreate women’s identities
and reshape the literary landscape?
During
the reading process, my thoughts raced to the visionary poet Mahakavi
Subramania Bharati, who, during the Indian independence envisioned the “Pudumai Penn,” as the embodiment
of strength and resilience. Through his immortal verses, Bharati fought
against child marriage, opposed the caste system, stood up for the emancipation
of women-
“Proud of her wisdom, she does not fear anyone on the earth;
The revolutionary woman does not look back.
Not willing to be drowned inside blinding ignorance,
She would emerge forward and prove her real worth.”
- “Pudumai Penn,” Subramanya Bharati
With
an economy of words, Pravat Kumar has presented fine images of the birth of a
child and the joys of childhood.
full moon day
fondly they name her Chandani
blossoms of blissfulness
swing all around
raining happiness in their life (p 9)
Tanka
poems are about human relationships; often are expressions of love,
self-reflection, or gratitude, which are evident in the ninety-five verses in
this collection.
they enjoy
playing snakes and ladder
mummy narrates
stories of Rani of Jhansi
sleeping on the floor on a summer night (p 10)…
often mummy feigns
there is enough in the kitchen
she senses
her mummy’s sobbing voice
as she warmly clasps hiding her tears (p 12)
For
the benefit of tanka poetry lovers and amateur writers, I’d like to borrow the
following lines from “The Tanka Sequence & Tanka-Prose as Introduction
to Tanka” – by Brian Zimmer. “Tanka requires learning a special set
of reading skills. One must be willing to slow down and pay attention to every
line, caesura, and image… Read too quickly tanka can appear easy, sometimes
banal, and often not very poetic.” Line breaks mark the rhythmic point
even while maintaining brevity.
at every step
they encourage her
until she grows up
the flower and the dream she shares
the garden they nourish all through their life (p 14)
…
convenience
of conquering everything
through pages of time
woman slotted to stay
second in the human counting (p 21)
Interestingly,
in poetry and literature, Nature, particularly the moon has been accredited
with femininity- “a symbol imbued with divine power to a feminine object.”
Pravat Kumar has presented several verses highlighting the moon and its
enigmatic presence – hide and seek/like the moon and clouds (p
10), the moon lost its shine/hiding behind the dense cloud (p 23), the
moon /is eclipsed /with no-fault (p 26), full moon/in the early
evening/the untimely eclipse/ darkens the way/ahead of the journey of her life
(p 29), the new moon sky/leaves far behind/the hazy shadow of her parting
(p 33), the crescent moon/in the mid-way sky/she counts stars (p
40), late in night/the stars blanket her scars/the moon cuddles her body
(p 41), crescent moon/in the dark midnight/she gently twists (p 52); as
an emerging rainbow brings untold joy after prolonged days of gloom, the final
lines in “I am a Woman” do that and more.
the new moon
peeps above the thatched home
a baby is born
unfolding promises
life is a poem and music its journey (p 55)
In
the roller coaster journey, optimism and resilience lead towards the goal;
turning back doesn’t, adjusting the ‘sails,’ according to the wind is the mantra. None will
disagree that sunshine – mere utterance fills hearts with a radiant glow and
elevates even the dull spirit into momentary bliss. Pravat Kumar’s lyrics
have dramatically captured the sun in its varied hues.
My
personal favorite is:
as the sun rises
with warbling muse
suddenly she feels
blend of strength within
strong-rooted like a peepal tree (p 49)
Unfurling her ‘ode to the eternal woman,’ Suparna Ghosh, in her foreword
annotates: ‘it is undeniable that the vast and indomitable, innate strength of
a woman, overcomes the gritty reality of her path.’
She is theatre unlimited
a drama immense
at will she thrills
a show all her own
complete unto herself
The Goddess (p 5)
Again,
Jenny Ward Angyal, Tanka Editor, Under the Basho, and Diana Webb, Editor
of Time Haiku succinctly observe that the short poems eulogize the ‘feminine
principle.’ – the qualities attributed to the gentle side that nurtures and
protects; in sync with Pravat Kumar’s lines in the comprehensive introduction:
‘Woman is revered as the symbol of power, compassion, love, care, majesty, and
empowerment through the ages.’
she remembers
the thick tears of her parents
she steps out with blessings
with her umbilical cord still intact
for an extended home with someone else (p 15)
…
he scratches her skin
like wiping over the doormat
as if a mopping cloth
he cleanses his dust
ungracefully pouring the foam of his sin (p 20)
…
she desires to revise
the pristine manuscript
for her daughter
as she reckons with a crescent smile
‘I am a Woman’ to prove again ( p 56)
…
Indeed! You can Control, Alt, Delete, begin on a clean slate.
You’re pure, no one can thwart, nothing can taint Bharati’s Pudhumai Penn!
A
century ago, Swami Vivekananda in his speech on “Women of India” delivered in
America, prophesied that the new civilization of the future would be “created
by modern women with Hindu spiritual culture. All the mischief to women
has come because men undertook to shape the destiny of women.” He believed
education and purity to be the tools that would enable them to stand up for
themselves. Swamiji believed in a combination of Roman, Greek, and Indian
traits in the modern woman – “Roman’s organisation, Greek’s wonderful love for
the beautiful and the Hindu’s backbone of religion and love of God.”
I
am left with deep appreciation for Dr Padhy, not merely for his precise
expressions but for his deep understanding of subtle truths. I believe he is
endowed with the qualities of prudence, benevolence and eloquence.
the priest
blesses for a son
to be fortunate enough
she wonders why the hymn omits
the opportunity of a sweet daughter (p 50)
He
comes across as a champion of the marginalised, as the above lines explain;
again, the lines in the preface expound: “Feminism is worshiped with great
reverence right from the Vedic culture to the modern history in India and has
been the cultural mainstream in the society.” – “Prakriti (female) and
Purusha (male) are manifestations for evolution and human
existence.”
The
feminine principle is not restricted to gender or chauvinism of the male or the
female, it encompasses the subtle energy that lies merged within one’s “spiritual
identity;” within the human psyche such qualities – “care, respect, trust,
patience, loyalty, love, empathy, mercy,” among others just lie unexplored.
Once it is understood, it opens undiscovered paths that “realign” the purpose
of human existence, which Swami Vivekananda accentuates in this manner:
“Out with the differentiation between man and woman—all is Atman, the sexless and
eternal self. Association with body and mind brings along the classification as
male and female.”
In
conclusion, I wish to reiterate that each of the lyrical verses in ‘I am
a Woman’ has offered me an enriching experience; and emboldened me to
share my thoughts –
stormy clouds make way
for the gentle sun
gently she rocks
the cradle
the child smiles in sleep
…
a colorful kite
soars into
the blue sky
childhood joys
back again
As
a writer primarily focused on metrical verses and verse libre, I’d like to add
that Pravat Kumar’s tanka poems offer evocative images – sinful seeds, uneasy
storm, solitude kite, tender tweets, pristine manuscript, crescent smile
are some that readily come to mind.
The
‘proof is in the pudding,’ I recommend you take a bite and, subsequently, share
it with others.
Cover photo sourced by
the reviewer
I am a Woman , Different Truths ( A
Global Sicial Journalism Platform) 29 Oct 2024
Reviewer: Hema Ravi
Monoku: Imagery and Juxtaposition 29 th June 2024
By Pravat K. padhy
The
"image" is a synonym for "picture". Imagery is a
literary device poets , writers uses connotation of words or diction that
create imagery of emotion, and sensitive connection with the readers. It is an
art of creation of mental images in the readers mind through connotative words
or diction. It is called ‘Imagism’ or
imagery in poetry. Imagery is related to the elements in a poem that
are related to the senses, the five senses (sight, hearing, touch,
taste, smell) and use of imagery implies image of smell, touch etc. [seasons
/ or seasonal words associated with sensory phrases ]
Ezra Pound: “An “Image” is that
which presents an intellectual and emotional complex in an instant of time . .
. It is the presentation of such a “complex” instantaneously which gives that
sense of sudden liberation; that sense of freedom from time limits and space
limits; that sense of sudden growth, which we experience in the presence of the
greatest works of art.”
A lightning flash:
between the forest trees
I have seen water
-Shikki
It is a visual imagery. Denotation of
actual lightning flash is not used here. On the contrary, connotation of
lightning flash implies to convey the readers the flow of water in the forest.
It employs visual imagery. Rather than denoting an actual lightning flash, it connotes the flow of water in the forest.
Say, some children in the ground may lead
you to think might be roaming in the ground, for playing or discussing
something. But if one of them holds a ball, you may feel children are at
play etc. The object ‘ball’ kindles the mental image, and story forthwith.
There are two imageries not
directly related to conventional senses:
Monoku is a
one-line poem featuring brevity and clarity of expression. The term was coined
by Jim Kacian in his essay “The Shape of Things to Come,” and weds a Greek
prefix (mono, one) with a Japanese suffix (ku, poem)
to create a new English term. The concept of one-line haiku in English
developed in the 1970s. Japanese haiku are written in a single vertical
line with 17 on (sound units, not syllables). (In conventional
3-line haiku, there is one pause (kireji) between the fragment and
phrase of haiku.) Monoku can be interpreted with multiple pauses (kireji)
depending on how it is parsed.
Some one-breath monoku cannot be expressed in
conventional 3-line haiku and poet may opt to use monoku to create imageries
with the shortest speech. Monoku is the braided stage of a river when it flows fast
downhill with more velocity. The economy and compressed feeling is released
with spontaneous energy. Normative haiku (3-line) is like a river meandering
with poetic resonance.
One-Breath :
The poem starts and finishes in one
stroke (shortest speech) without any pause or break in between (poetics of
caesura) or maybe subtle pauses in monoku corresponding to speech rhythm. It
has to have a vivid interplay of image and poetic sense. Otherwise, it would
appear more like a sentence or a prosaic expression.
This white
space acts as a pivot for exhibiting the sense of juxtaposition or disjunction.
There is an economy of language. “One-line
one-thought”: “Rather than a
piling up of images upon the imagination, a single image is extended or
elaborated into a second context, stated or implied.” -Jim
Kacian
[implied juxtaposition or passive
juxtaposition in case of one-breath/ syntax and semantics]
an aid I curve
skyward for the temple tree, The Helping Hand Haiku Anthology, 2020
gunshot
the length of the lake
Jim
Kacian, First publication: Harold G. Henderson International Haiku Contest
2005,
Jim Wilson describes, “What
distinguishes the monoku from the haiku is that the single line of the monoku
has no breaks; it just goes from the first to last syllable.” The monoku
is instead one “complex statement with overlapping parts forming a complex
whole.”
in a
tent in the rain i become a climate
-Jim
Kacian, First publication: NOON 2
Monoku more than one Kireji
(Classical ones)
the zero-shadow moment I am with myself, By Pravat Kumar Padhy , The Heron’s Nest Vol. XXI,
Number 3, 2019
Nicholas
Klacsanzky interprets the above haiku in his haiku Commentary:
“As with most fine one-line haiku, this poem can be read
in several ways:
A monoku can be interpreted more than one way by switching different
syntactic elements. The different readings of the poem can add new depth or
dimension, add meanings, extend, or juxtapose one another to create several
interrelated poems with shifted importance to different word phrase or
meanings.
the zero-shadow/
moment I am with myself [zero shadow is emphasized]
or:
the zero-shadow moment/
I am with myself [time is emphasized]
or:
the zero-shadow moment I am with myself
Examples of some
of my monoku related to imagery along with a few examples by others
Imagery and
Juxtaposition:
1.Imageryof sight.
on the back of a refugee a pregnant dog thrashing the
shore current, is/let, 21.3.2020
streamflow of another milky way, Heliosparrow Poetry Journal, 27th October 2020
sun, sea, sand and
the footprints, Modern
Haiku, 50:3, 2019
[interrelated
juxtapositions]
googled for a word full of twinkling stars, The Haiku Foundation, Workplace, Theme: Lost
in Translation, 8th March 2017
mallards leaving in the water rippled
sky By Penny Harter, The Monkey's Face,1987
family photo another maid half visible
Engin Gülez, whiptail: journal of the
single-line poem Issue 5: As the Now Takes Hold (November 2022)
2.Imagery of sound
the sound of silence
into Shinto shrines, Akitsu
Quarterly, Winter Issue, 2017
dune after
dune the migrating songs, Presence
60, 2018
crowing cocks reach the morning
sun,
EarthRise 2015: Years of Light, Haiku Foundation
following the trail of receding
light a cricket’s cry, Presence
#78, 2024
3.Imagery of
touch.
a stone in her tiny
hand once a mountain, Wales Haiku
Journal, Summer 2022
[a
technique of ‘Narrowing focus’( mountain to stone)]
friendship day how
thoughtfully birds live with the trees, Presence #
73, 2022
a piece of chalk in
my pocket first day of retirement, Frogpond, 41:2 Spring –Summer Issue, 2018; Mann Library 15th
February 2021
4.Imagery of
smell.
at every window the moon and night
jasmine Unpublished
Kind of Blue the smell of rain By Allan Burns, Acorn 20,
2008.
the
thyme-scented morning lizard's tongue flicking out By Martin
Lucas, Presence 39, 2009
burning sun the cool of her sweat on my lips By David
Batta, Face Book , 7.5.2020
5.Imagery of taste.
peeling orange taste of the crescent
moon (Unpublished)
*****
“peeling layers of childhood
green mango chutney”
-Neena Singh, Heliosparrow, 2020
(12 syllables. Structurally, the use of ‘gerund’ (peeling) in monoku
writing has been nicely crafted.)
writing orange she
peels away layers of the bitter unknown from each moon By Ken Sawitri, Under
the Basho, 2015
melting icebergs the bitterness of blue curacao By
Ingrid Baluchi
6.Kinesthetic
Imagery: Images of moments, action
ambulance siren the beggar bows his head, Prune Juice # 39,
May 2023
ant trail somewhere the missing
sound,
Heliosparrow
Poetry Journal, 27 October 2020
snow follows snow the layers of silence, Kontinuum,
vol.1,no.1,2021
floating clouds birds fly the other way, brass
bell: a haiku journal, July 2014
the clouds
disappear into colourless, Proletaria, Dec 2019
7.Organic Imagery:
related to personal experience, fear, love, loneliness etc
the moon behind the shyness your crescent smile,
A
Hundred Gourds, December 2015
autumn solitude my footprints on the desert sand, Presence # 58, 2017
obituary column messaging silence into the sky, Under
the Basho, 28.8. 2017
moonrise the sky from the oncology
wing, Presence #61, 2018, a hole in the light: The Red Moon Anthology of
English-Language Haiku 2018
dreams she
conceals winter chrysanthemum, Whiptail, Issue 4, 2022
8.Use of synethesia
ie. fusion of sense (ex. gray happening, yellow voice, loud
colour etc ) in a profound way is
an art of writing haiku.
the train I board flags the green light of memories,
Unpublished
forest poem a child rhymes green and green
(later published in Cold
Moon Journal, 19th September 2024)
an eagle shadows a wheat field’s yellow
whisper , tinywords, Issue 19.1, 2019
-Kala Ramesh
9.Sense Reversal:
The technique of one-word images with
opposite senses at the beginning and at the end of the one-liner can be an
innovative way of writing monoku.
bright sky still holding half of the darkness, Blo͞o Outlier Journal, Winter Issue, 2020
10.Figurative Imagery
hot argument snow falls of its own, ephemerae 1B, 2018
a mother’s life
revolving door
-Vandana Parshar, Haiku Dialogue, The Haiku Foundation,
14th April 2021
the shadow in the folded napkin – by Cor van den Heuvel, My Haiku
Path’
“I began to think of one-image and one-line haiku as
a part of my approach to haiku. There is almost always something else in the
experience of the reader that will resonate, if only sub-consciously, with a
single image-if that image is striking and evocative enough. One may think of
it as an invisible metaphor.”- Cor van den
…imagistic fusion
combines with one-line brevity to create a sense of insubstantiality in the
read text.” – Robert Gilbert
leaves blowing
into a sentence [like a sentence]
-Bob Boldman, Cicada 4.4, 1980
Richard writes: “…the
object cannot possibly satisfy the subject. …. In Boldman, we can see the outer
reality of leaves blowing into a shape, say a line, but to become semantic
stretches the sense of subject-object agreement.”
11.Abstraction imagery
the zero-shadow moment I am with myself, By Pravat Kumar Padhy , The Heron’s Nest Vol. XXI,
Number 3, 2019
who I am the body contours who I am not, Whiptail, Issue 4, 2022
(a bit abstraction
style with disjunction)
sculpting my body into a sanctum sanctorum
-Sholka Shanker , Mann Library’s Daily Haiku, July 21, 2023
12. Multiplex or Composite Imaginary
cross-beddings on the rock surface once
the river flowed towards sunrise, The Pan Haiku Review, Issue 1, 2023
[Geol history,
signature markings on rock surface inferring Process-Response relationship]
One-liner Vs. 3-Line Haiku (tercet):
melting
away my pain-- garden dew
The
Heron’s Nest, Vol. XV, No. 4, December 2013, tinywords, 18th January
2018; Mann Library’s Daily Haiku, 26th February 2021
The seasonal references and human aspects have been well
juxtaposed in the above monoku. The patient feels solace after the
disappearance of pain like dew. There is no mention of sunlight for the gradual
disappearance of dew. It is poetically embedded that the warmth of love and
care might have caused the reduction in pain.
Here the transmission of images is compressed and polarized.
Now, let us try to put it in the form of a 3-line:
garden dew--
the warmth of the sun
melts away my pain
The middle line is introduced to express it in a
conventional 3-line format of haiku, which has a fragment and a phrase with juxtaposition. One can
visualise the structural style and the intensity of poetry in both cases. The
monoku is more expressive for the readers and it renders enough space to
visualize and expand the sublime poetic beauty in its brevity. The
conventional structural format in 3-line is more of an expanded poetic style
with enriching resonance and elegant juxtaposition.
Juxtaposition:
[implied
juxtaposition or passive juxtaposition in case of one-breath]
friendship day how
thoughtfully birds live with the trees, Presence #
73, 2022
James Longenbach defines poetry this way, “Poetry is the sound of language organized
in lines.”
drifted thoughts the fallen leaves, Presence #72, 2022
who I am the body contours who I am not, Whiptail, Issue 4, 2022
(a bit abstraction
style with disjunction)
dense bamboo bush the comfort of a
sparrow, Presence 63, 2019
the ocean in a raindrop inside my womb
a heart by Kala Ramesh, Modern Haiku, 43.3, 2012
clothing the night white jasmines by
Richa Sharma, Proletaria, 2019
on the lake wrinkled face of wind by Ramesh Anand, Mann Library’s Daily
Haiku, July 21, 2015
*****************
